Saturday, June 08, 2013

Where I Come From

We bought a desk a couple of weeks back and took the time to make a few minor improvements to it (ie. cleaning it up, refinishing the top wood portion, some sanding, and a few paint touch ups) other than that it was the perfect find for having the space to write!

I wanted the desk to be a pretty clean space, but of course wanted to put a few personal inspirational items on it and when I was cleaning a few boxes out I came across this photo. This is inspirational to me. This is a polaroid taken at my parents wedding of my Great-Grandmother, my Grandma, her sister, one of my God-Mother’s, and my Grandma’s other sister. Each and every one of them I can draw something from, even if all of them are but memories in my mind. 

My Great-Grandmother Ruth was someone I always remember having fun with. She was spry, spunky, and had a wonderfully generous heart. She lived longer than my Grandma, so I have a few more clear memories of her which entail; turtles, swimming, Easter egg hunts, newspapers, laughter, popcorn, and the family always being around. 

Then my Grandma Ginny; my heart beams and breaks all at the same time when I see this photo. I was the only grandchild that ever really got to know her before she passed in 1992. I was nine years old and even by then she had already played such a big role in my life. I try not to live with many “what ifs” but she is my most major what if she was still alive? What if she had been there through my teen years, when I first started to experiment with taking photos, my first boyfriend, picking a college to attend, moving to a country I know she loved, getting married…I miss her. I miss her charismatic spirit I so often hear people talk about. She was the life of the party and I am sorry I missed out on a majority of that, but I soak up what I did get to experience with her. Honda rides to the Santa Cruz boardwalk, baking cookies, having her come to many of my dance recitals, being my caregiver when I had chicken pox, she was a wonderful lady who I love and miss daily. 

My Auntie Shirley, My God-Mother Lily, and my Aunt Willa all were some of the strongest women I had ever met. They (just like my Great-Grandmother and Grandma) had so much adversity in their lives and yet came out on top in their own ways. They were consistently what I viewed to be matriarchs of our family and provided a sense of history and purpose to our big boisterous clan.

They were all beautiful women who have left a legacy to their families. To see their smiling faces in this photo is a wonderful reminder of everything they have left me and how it created a part of me, made me this creative thinking, cooking baking, hard headed, beautiful woman. 

This reminder of the generations that have come before, is dedicated to these wonderful women who exemplified hard work and a love for life.


Nannette Ricaforte said...

I am so jealous (but also ecstatic) for your desk (which I absolutely adore) and the fact you have space to write. Living at home is not conducive to a writer's life which is why you see me posting pics of the Cerritos Library on Instagram. LOL!

I love the vintage desk and what you did with it. It also encouraged me to see what you wrote about your grandmothers and aunts. I hope one day Rylee will express how much I've influenced her life, too. <3

.heidi.noelle. said...

Nanny getting this desk was a blog post of its own, but in a fluster and wanting my own space I found it on a Friday on Craigslist and we picked it up on a Sunday. All in all it was a total God thing that we came together ;)

I have NO doubt that she will express the same kind of love and adoration. You are a wonderful in every way! xo