The Heart of the Matter

The older I get the more understanding I have for myself and for God's heart. My heart isn't attached to the city in which I stand. It's attached to the people in it. Over time though I have discovered that my heart is really drawn to the cultures and people that are beyond my own territories.

It truly makes me laugh to think about, because of how it all fits into my story. Back in 2002 at the start of college the idea of living somewhere other than the comfort of my own country was nothing but something that brave, passionate, "cool" people did. Yet, there was a shift, a change, a charge...whatever you want to call it, at some point in that first year of my last stint of education. I got a charge to love others that were beyond my own territory. But now this lesson has come full circle. It is also about loving those that surround me in this place that I once had been so comfortable in that I never wanted to leave. It is learning to have a balance of both in my life.

I had a conversation with a good friend on Sunday and we were reminiscing about the past and discussing the dreams of the future. We were both left with a sense of amazement how our dreams and desires "way back when" have in many ways shifted to our "todays" versions of those dreams and desires. The somewhat scary part (and I wonder why it is that I did this) is that I didn't really dream past college. I had an idea of what might come after that last year of school but my dreams really stopped there. These past three years have been wonderful...a true wonderful mystery written out day by day. I have excelled in ways that I never thought I could. I have gone far beyond that girl in the cafeteria those special Wednesday nights. It has been so much more full and richer than I could have ever dreamed. And the best part of it all, if God wills it, there is so much more mystery and balance to be discovered in this life.