Monday, January 25, 2010

Welcome to Reality

Being back in New Zealand I tend to do this whole flash back thing when Kristin and I were living here. I go back to memories we made, the lives that we had here, the friendships that we cultivated. And now I as I sit here two (going on three) years removed I realized this place helped me grow up.

My Mum specifically likes to tease me about my love of the "Peter Pan" story and how her Heidi girl just never wanted to grow up. She would give you examples throughout my whole life on how I tried to delay the growing up process. We can laugh about it now, but through each of those "lets not grow up moments" I always struggled and wrestled with the idea of what it meant to grow up. This place forced me to adapt in ways I never had to before and in an environment unfamiliar to me, with my main support system being thousands of miles away, and truly even if I did try and reach out there would have been nothing they could have done to assist me in the process.

But now having been back in the states I think I transferred the attitude that I had here in New Zealand to life at home. Take chances. Yes, it may be a risk and it may hurt, but then again it could totally be worth it. Learn to say yes to new things and random adventures rather than always living by the book. Take ahold of your responsibilities and follow through with them with a certain level of joy rather than passiveness.

I still get a kick out of my year in New Zealand because I realize that many don't get opportunities like that. Not many get the chance to start their "grown up" adventure, whatever that may look like, living in a culture quite different to their own. New Zealand was a great playground of sorts, but it was also my own unique way of waking up to reality and realizing that growing up was inevitable and I could either fight it or learn to enjoy the process. Coming back here reminds me of this, so with it comes some sadness to know I am even farther along in this journey, but also a greater anticipation of what is to come.

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